Kindness must be modeled to kids; it’s not a skill they can learn in one etiquette class. No matter how well the class is taught, and how well they perform while in class. You have to model kindness, it has to be something they can observe in you even when you aren’t giving instruction.
Patience, and appreciation are high on the scale of kindness. My husband and I do our to best model patience by stopping whatever we may be doing to give our family, attention for the accomplishments that are special to them, no matter how small. We also show appreciation by complimenting and noticing all the details and all of the effort that was put in.
My daughter Aaliyah drew a family photo in black and white in her sketch book. To many parents, and busy teachers being shown a drawing would’ve been something they said "nice, good job" to and moved on. But being an etiquette instructor for 14 years and somewhat of a creative; I’m hyper aware of modeling proper etiquette, and good manners and paying attention to details, not just teaching it. I knew what my daughter wanted was a keen appreciative eye to bring her drawing to life. She wanted to be appreciated for what she had done, and she wanted to be made to feel special. So I took it a step further...
Because I’m also creative I complimented first her attention to detail, I pointed out how she conveyed all of our personalities so well with the winking eyes, and outfit selections right on down to the way we each love to wear our hair. Then I took it a step further; I asked her would she mind if I uploaded her photo and used it for my website. Her eyes got wide! she said "it's not good enough for a website mommy" Boy was she in for a treat...I took that drawing and showed her all the things it was good enough for while boosting her confidence and expanding her creativity.
We made greeting cards;
Wall canvas art;
A logo;
A coffee mug;
A t shirt;
And so much more
She was absolutely astonished that her drawing could be used in so many ways. Sometimes we have to show our kids how simple things when valued can become bigger things. Simple things when ignored can never become anything more. This is the core of appreciation; as parents we all want to raise children who are appreciative, and mindful, who are patient, and detail oriented. because we understand these are the micro character traits that make up proper etiquette and good manners.
Can you imagine if I would've just said "Nice, good job" and moved on? She wouldn't have received the confidence boost, and learning opportunity that was imparted by patience, and appreciation. Etiquette and manners take time to develop in ourselves and in others. It requires; patience, attention, and time to go the extra mile. This is exactly the energy I bring to my etiquette classes with young people, and it's exactly why I love what I do. It's my passion and my purpose to inspire kindness with kindness. I hope this small example of kindness has inspired you to pay more attention to the little things, and go the extra mile. Kindness when modeled to children, teaches them how to be kind faster than any etiquette class.
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